Mother and Father Goose

When I was growing up-and realized that there was such a thing as DIVORCE-I sometimes wished my mom and dad would get one. Little did I know that what I was wishing for is one of the most traumatic experiences for kids to go through. My parents were married for 50 years, 4 months and 24 days, til the day my Dad died.  Be sure to check out the bottom of this post for their cute pictures!

Now in the neighborhood where my daughter was raised for 12 years of her life, our house was pretty much the one that the kids hung out at-from the time my daughter was 4 to 12 years old.  Somehow they would all know when I was making spaghetti, or when we had a fresh new batch of brownies, cookies, or when I had just gone to the grocery store and gotten cool snacks. It got old sometimes-and I remarked to my husband that they were just using us (yeah right-at that age I don’t think they had hidden agendas), but then I would get over it. How I wish I had known then how much to appreciate it, and relish the days that they all wanted to jump on OUR trampoline, or be in our pool (such as it was). I remember one day looking out and there were kids I had never even seen in our neighborhood, jumping on the trampoline! YIKES! I almost had a stroke! I couldn’t get the words out fast enough “EVERYBODY OFF THE TRAMPOLINE!!!” Then I made them all take contracts home to get their parents signatures with the rules of our trampoline. How many can jump, and when, etc.

Fast forward to my now 16 year old daughter and most of her friends. My husband and I are one of the very few of her friends circle that are still married to each other-and have not been through at least one divorce.  But no marriage is perfect-least of all ours, and I have nothing against divorce, it’s just so rough on the kids. And my hubby and I don’t drink very often-(nothing against that either-if the time and place are right)-but I think when parents do that-they first need to consider who is relying on them. For that reason-I am SO glad DH and I didn’t break out our New Year’s Champagne from 2007! Yes-we forgot to even pop the cork-and it was a good thing, since I wound up having to drive about 120 miles roundtrip to pick up my daughter from a friends house. She went to spend New Year’s Eve with her friend who had recently moved. Then they wound up going to another friends house, she didn’t know anyone and felt very weirded out by the whole thing. She called us-and I went to get her. The New Year’s Eve of 2008-again-we didn’t pop the cork on that bottle of champagne. We thought about it-but something told us not to. Once again-I get a call. Dear daughter was supposed to be spending the night with a friend, they took a taxi with some other friends to our local Waffle House-but after eating couldn’t afford the cab home. So they started walking (it’s only about 2 or 3 miles)-but it was VERY cold. And since they were out after curfew-the cops stopped them-and guess what?? They call me and my husband to come get them. And I went. (DH would go on these jaunts-but he doesn’t see so well at night). So tonight when two of my daughter’s friends called me to come get them from the gym because they had no way home-I went. Without even considering any other option. Both of the girls families are divorced, one of the moms had already had her nightcap, and the other girls parents are in the middle of a brutal divorce. It’s really taking a toll on her family, and it breaks my heart. I’m not telling you all this to make my family sounds like the perfect family-we are so far from it. But I have told my daughter to always call me -NO MATTER WHAT-and no questions asked.  It makes me feel good that no only will she do that, but her friends aren’t afraid to do it too.  And I would also want them to do the same for my daughter-if she ever needed it.  So here’s the thing (or one of the things anyway), if you’re going through (or have gone through) a rough divorce-cut your kids some slack people!!!!

They depend on you-and when you had them-you sort of sealed the deal with your DNA that you would look after them the best you could. So put on  your big girl/boy panties and do the job you’ve signed up for.  You won’t reget it!

Ok-I am getting off my soapbox now.  But to AA and SS-if you ever read this-I meant what I said-call me anytime, and you are always welcome here. Love you girls!!





~ by Rhonda on March 19, 2009.

2 Responses to “Mother and Father Goose”

  1. all ur blogs have affirmed what i already knew that u and dh are wonderful people. you daughter is a lucky lucky young lady. im glad u guy are part of my extended family and the pics of ur parents are so cool.

  2. I love youu mom! i know i can always count on you for anything, anytime. we have rough days – but we always make it through them 🙂 and thats why i love you so much! you and dad mean the world to me, and i wouldnt have it any other way! i know sometimes you think i dont appreciate the things you and dad do for me, but trust me.. i do. im just not good at expressing it i guess. those pictures of grandma and grandpa are adorable 🙂

    LOVE YA!

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