Signs……….

You remember that movie, right? The one with Mel Gibson and Joaquin Phoenix? About the aliens, where his kids put aluminium foil on their heads to ward them off?  Well, I have SIGNS, but not those kinds.  These are subtle little signs that I am seeing everyday in my Mom.  I try to let her do as much for herself as possible, it helps her to stay as independent as she can, and makes her feel better.  I know that for people with Alzheimer’s, being treated (or made to feel) like a baby irritates them, and my mother has always been so independent.  She can still do her meds-but I double-check them, she mails her bills, and stuff. But I asked her about a particular piece of mail I was expecting, and she brought me something from 2006.   Today we took Penny to the dog park (and had a WONDERFUL time!), and on the way home Mom said she wanted to stop and get ice cream. So I parked in the parking lot at our local Publix, and let her go in to get her ice cream. Well, 45 minutes later she still wasn’t out. I was beginning to wander if the store had eaten her, or she’d found an escape route in the back and made a run for it!!  So I left the puppy in the car and went in. There she was on aisle 3 (I believe), between the pasta and the canned vegetables with a cart FULL of food!  All things she would eat, and she had a good assortment, so I let her have her things, we got her bread and hit the checkout.  She spent more than normal, but she was “stocking up” as people from that generation have a tendency to do.  She has extra $$ since she lives with me now and doesn’t go to Ross all the time :-). So I didn’t stress her out over somethings in her cart that she might have done differently, because really, it wasn’t that important. Not important enough to question her and give her a reason to get aggravated.   She loves to feed my birds-and a couple of weeks ago she went to refill the window feeder, and when I turned around she had taken it completely apart and lost the screws.  I told her it wasn’t important, we could get new ones.  But, later I found her crying because she didn’t understand why she couldn’t do it right.  She had done it before.  It broke my heart and made me realize that somethings are not important.  I might just go buy a bag full of those screws and be prepared.  I told her not to worry-I forget how to do things all the time. And it was just a silly old bird feeder anyway. These are the types of signs I am seeing.  It is truly breaking my heart that some cruel, uncaring, brutal and heartless disease is stealing her from me!  I feel helpless, cause I like to fix things.  I pray everyday for her clarity of mind, but I know it will slowly be taken from her.   Her brother came to get her Sunday and take her to see her sister, it was a nice break for her and I. And it did her good to be with her siblings. They were all together except for her one brother in FL, and he is in poor health.  I am glad she had the chance to do that. If you know someone, or have a friend who is a caregiver for an Alzheimer’s patient-offer to give them a break, it really helps to stay fresh and deal with the changes that are taking place.

I am praising God for my Mom, and getting to spend this time with her, and I am also still praying for a dear friend whose mother recently passed away.  She suffered for a short while, but I know God in His mercy and grace saved her from a much longer suffering,, and my friend is at peace with that.

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~ by Rhonda on October 22, 2009.

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